1984by George OrwellPart 1
Chapter 8
From somewhere at the bottom of a passage the smell of
roasting coffee -- real coffee, not Victory Coffee -- came floating out
into the street. Winston paused involuntarily. For perhaps two seconds
he was back in the half-forgotten world of his childhood. Then a door
banged, seeming to cut off the smell as abruptly as though it had been
a sound.
He had walked several kilometres over pavements, and his varicose
ulcer was throbbing. This was the second time in three weeks that he
had missed an evening at the Community Centre: a rash act, since you
could be certain that the number of your attendances at the Centre was
carefully checked. In principle a Party member had no spare time, and
was never alone except in bed. It was assumed that when he was not
working, eating, or sleeping he would be taking part in some kind of
communal recreation: to do anything that suggested a taste for
solitude, even to go for a walk by yourself, was always slightly
dangerous. There was a word for it in Newspeak: ownlife, it was called,
meaning individualism and eccentricity. But this evening as he came out
of the Ministry the balminess of the April air had tempted him. The sky
was a warmer blue than he had seen it that year, and suddenly the long,
noisy evening at the Centre, the boring, exhausting games, the
lectures, the creaking camaraderie oiled by gin, had seemed
intolerable. On impulse he had turned away from the bus-stop and
wandered off into the labyrinth of London, first south, then east, then
north again, losing himself among unknown streets and hardly bothering
in which direction he was going.
'If there is hope,' he had written in the diary, 'it lies in the
proles.' The words kept coming back to him, statement of a mystical
truth and a palpable absurdity. He was somewhere in the vague,
brown-coloured slums to the north and east of what had once been Saint
Pancras Station. He was walking up a cobbled street of little
two-storey houses with battered doorways which gave straight on the
pavement and which were somehow curiously suggestive of ratholes. There
were puddles of filthy water here and there among the cobbles. In and
out of the dark doorways, and down narrow alley-ways that branched off
on either side, people swarmed in astonishing numbers -- girls in full
bloom, with crudely lipsticked mouths, and youths who chased the girls,
and swollen waddling women who showed you what the girls would be like
in ten years' time, and old bent creatures shuffling along on splayed
feet, and ragged barefooted children who played in the puddles and then
scattered at angry yells from their mothers. Perhaps a quarter of the
windows in the street were broken and boarded up. Most of the people
paid no attention to Winston; a few eyed him with a sort of guarded
curiosity. Two monstrous women with brick-red forearms folded across
thelr aprons were talking outside a doorway. Winston caught scraps of
conversation as he approached.
'"Yes," I says to 'er, "that's all very well," I says. "But if
you'd of been in my place you'd of done the same as what I done. It's
easy to criticize," I says, "but you ain't got the same problems as
what I got."'
'Ah,' said the other, 'that's jest it. That's jest where it is.'
The strident voices stopped abruptly. The women studied him in
hostile silence as he went past. But it was not hostility, exactly;
merely a kind of wariness, a momentary stiffening, as at the passing of
some unfamiliar animal. The blue overalls of the Party could not be a
common sight in a street like this. Indeed, it was unwise to be seen in
such places, unless you had definite business there. The patrols might
stop you if you happened to run into them. 'May I see your papers,
comrade? What are you doing here? What time did you leave work? Is this
your usual way home?' -- and so on and so forth. Not that there was any
rule against walking home by an unusual route: but it was enough to
draw attention to you if the Thought Police heard about it.
Suddenly the whole street was in commotion. There were yells of
warning from all sides. People were shooting into the doorways like
rabbits. A young woman leapt out of a doorway a little ahead of
Winston, grabbed up a tiny child playing in a puddle, whipped her apron
round it, and leapt back again, all in one movement. At the same
instant a man in a concertina-like black suit, who had emerged from a
side alley, ran towards Winston, pointing excitedly to the sky.
'Steamer!' he yelled. 'Look out, guv'nor! Bang over'ead! Lay down quick!'
'Steamer' was a nickname which, for some reason, the proles applied
to rocket bombs. Winston promptly flung himself on his face. The proles
were nearly always right when they gave you a warning of this kind.
They seemed to possess some kind of instinct which told them several
seconds in advance when a rocket was coming, although the rockets
supposedly travelled faster than sound. Winston clasped his forearms
above his head. There was a roar that seemed to make the pavement
heave; a shower of light objects pattered on to his back. When he stood
up he found that he was covered with fragments of glass from the
nearest window.
He walked on. The bomb had demolished a group of houses 200 metres
up the street. A black plume of smoke hung in the sky, and below it a
cloud of plaster dust in which a crowd was already forming around the
ruins. There was a little pile of plaster lying on the pavement ahead
of him, and in the middle of it he could see a bright red streak. When
he got up to it he saw that it was a human hand severed at the wrist.
Apart from the bloody stump, the hand was so completely whitened as to
resemble a plaster cast.
He kicked the thing into the gutter, and then, to avoid the crowd,
turned down a side-street to the right. Within three or four minutes he
was out of the area which the bomb had affected, and the sordid
swarming life of the streets was going on as though nothing had
happened. It was nearly twenty hours, and the drinking-shops which the
proles frequented ('pubs', they called them) were choked with
customers. From their grimy swing doors, endlessly opening and
shutting, there came forth a smell of urine, sawdust, and sour beer. In
an angle formed by a projecting house-front three men were standing
very close together, the middle one of them holding a folded-up
newspaper which the other two were studying over his shoulder. Even
before he was near enough to make out the expression on their faces,
Winston could see absorption in every line of their bodies. It was
obviously some serious piece of news that they were reading. He was a
few paces away from them when suddenly the group broke up and two of
the men were in violent altercation. For a moment they seemed almost on
the point of blows.
'Can't you bleeding well listen to what I say? I tell you no number ending in seven ain't won for over fourteen months!'
'Yes, it 'as, then!'
'No, it 'as not! Back 'ome I got the 'ole lot of 'em for over two
years wrote down on a piece of paper. I takes 'em down reg'lar as the
clock. An' I tell you, no number ending in seven-'
'Yes, a seven 'as won! I could pretty near tell you the bleeding
number. Four oh seven, it ended in. It were in February -- second week
in February.'
'February your grandmother! I got it all down in black and white. An' I tell you, no number-'
'Oh, pack it in!' said the third man.
They were talking about the Lottery. Winston looked back when he
had gone thirty metres. They were still arguing, with vivid, passionate
faces. The Lottery, with its weekly pay-out of enormous prizes, was the
one public event to which the proles paid serious attention. It was
probable that there were some millions of proles for whom the Lottery
was the principal if not the only reason for remaining alive. It was
their delight, their folly, their anodyne, their intellectual
stimulant. Where the Lottery was concerned, even people who could
barely read and write seemed capable of intricate calculations and
staggering feats of memory. There was a whole tribe of men who made a
living simply by selling systems, forecasts, and lucky amulets. Winston
had nothing to do with the running of the Lottery, which was managed by
the Ministry of Plenty, but he was aware (indeed everyone in the party
was aware) that the prizes were largely imaginary. Only small sums were
actually paid out, the winners of the big prizes being non-existent
persons. In the absence of any real inter-communication between one
part of Oceania and another, this was not difficult to arrange.
But if there was hope, it lay in the proles. You had to cling on to
that. When you put it in words it sounded reasonable: it was when you
looked at the human beings passing you on the pavement that it became
an act of faith. The street into which he had turned ran downhill. He
had a feeling that he had been in this neighbourhood before, and that
there was a main thoroughfare not far away. From somewhere ahead there
came a din of shouting voices. The street took a sharp turn and then
ended in a flight of steps which led down into a sunken alley where a
few stallkeepers were selling tired-looking vegetables. At this moment
Winston remembered where he was. The alley led out into the main
street, and down the next turning, not five minutes away, was the
junk-shop where he had bought the blank book which was now his diary.
And in a small stationer's shop not far away he had bought his
penholder and his bottle of ink.
He paused for a moment at the top of the steps. On the opposite
side of the alley there was a dingy little pub whose windows appeared
to be frosted over but in reality were merely coated with dust. A very
old man, bent but active, with white moustaches that bristled forward
like those of a prawn, pushed open the swing door and went in. As
Winston stood watching, it occurred to him that the old man, who must
be eighty at the least, had already been middle-aged when the
Revolution happened. He and a few others like him were the last links
that now existed with the vanished world of capitalism. In the Party
itself there were not many people left whose ideas had been formed
before the Revolution. The older generation had mostly been wiped out
in the great purges of the fifties and sixties, and the few who
survived had long ago been terrified into complete intellectual
surrender. If there was any one still alive who could give you a
truthful account of conditions in the early part of the century, it
could only be a prole. Suddenly the passage from the history book that
he had copied into his diary came back into Winston's mind, and a
lunatic impulse took hold of him. He would go into the pub, he would
scrape acquaintance with that old man and question him. He would say to
him: 'Tell me about your life when you were a boy. What was it like in
those days? Were things better than they are now, or were they worse?'
Hurriedly, lest he should have time to become frightened, he
descended the steps and crossed the narrow street. It was madness of
course. As usual, there was no definite rule against talking to proles
and frequenting their pubs, but it was far too unusual an action to
pass unnoticed. If the patrols appeared he might plead an attack of
faintness, but it was not likely that they would believe him. He pushed
open the door, and a hideous cheesy smell of sour beer hit him in the
face. As he entered the din of voices dropped to about half its volume.
Behind his back he could feel everyone eyeing his blue overalls. A game
of darts which was going on at the other end of the room interrupted
itself for perhaps as much as thirty seconds. The old man whom he had
followed was standing at the bar, having some kind of altercation with
the barman, a large, stout, hook-nosed young man with enormous
forearms. A knot of others, standing round with glasses in their hands,
were watching the scene.
'I arst you civil enough, didn't I?' said the old man,
straightening his shoulders pugnaciously. 'You telling me you ain't got
a pint mug in the 'ole bleeding boozer?'
'And what in hell's name is a pint?' said the barman, leaning forward with the tips of his fingers on the counter.
'Ark at 'im! Calls 'isself a barman and don't know what a pint is!
Why, a pint's the 'alf of a quart, and there's four quarts to the
gallon. 'Ave to teach you the A, B, C next.'
'Never heard of 'em,' said the barman shortly. 'Litre and half
litre -- that's all we serve. There's the glasses on the shelf in front
of you.
'I likes a pint,' persisted the old man. 'You could 'a drawed me
off a pint easy enough. We didn't 'ave these bleeding litres when I was
a young man.'
'When you were a young man we were all living in the treetops,' said the barman, with a glance at the other customers.
There was a shout of laughter, and the uneasiness caused by
Winston's entry seemed to disappear. The old man's whitestubbled face
had flushed pink. He turned away, muttering to himself, and bumped into
Winston. Winston caught him gently by the arm.
'May I offer you a drink?' he said.
'You're a gent,' said the other, straightening his shoulders again.
He appeared not to have noticed Winston's blue overalls. 'Pint!' he
added aggressively to the barman. 'Pint of wallop.'
The barman swished two half-litres of dark-brown beer into thick
glasses which he had rinsed in a bucket under the counter. Beer was the
only drink you could get in prole pubs. The proles were supposed not to
drink gin, though in practice they could get hold of it easily enough.
The game of darts was in full swing again, and the knot of men at the
bar had begun talking about lottery tickets. Winston's presence was
forgotten for a moment. There was a deal table under the window where
he and the old man could talk without fear of being overheard. It was
horribly dangerous, but at any rate there was no telescreen in the
room, a point he had made sure of as soon as he came in.
"E could 'a drawed me off a pint,' grumbled the old man as he
settled down behind a glass. 'A 'alf litre ain't enough. It don't
satisfy. And a 'ole litre's too much. It starts my bladder running. Let
alone the price.'
'You must have seen great changes since you were a young man,' said Winston tentatively.
The old man's pale blue eyes moved from the darts board to the bar,
and from the bar to the door of the Gents, as though it were in the
bar-room that he expected the changes to have occurred.
'The beer was better,' he said finally. 'And cheaper! When I was a
young man, mild beer -- wallop we used to call it -- was fourpence a
pint. That was before the war, of course.'
'Which war was that?' said Winston.
'It's all wars,' said the old man vaguely. He took up his glass,
and his shoulders straightened again. 'Ere's wishing you the very best
of 'ealth!'
In his lean throat the sharp-pointed Adam's apple made a
surprisingly rapid up-and-down movement, and the beer vanished. Winston
went to the bar and came back with two more half-litres. The old man
appeared to have forgotten his prejudice against drinking a full litre.
'You are very much older than I am,' said Winston. 'You must have
been a grown man before I was born. You can remember what it was like
in the old days, before the Revolution. People of my age don't really
know anything about those times. We can only read about them in books,
and what it says in the books may not be true. I should like your
opinion on that. The history books say that life before the Revolution
was completely different from what it is now. There was the most
terrible oppression, injustice, poverty worse than anything we can
imagine. Here in London, the great mass of the people never had enough
to eat from birth to death. Half of them hadn't even boots on their
feet. They worked twelve hours a day, they left school at nine, they
slept ten in a room. And at the same time there were a very few people,
only a few thousands -- the capitalists, they were called -- who were
rich and powerful. They owned everything that there was to own. They
lived in great gorgeous houses with thirty servants, they rode about in
motor-cars and four-horse carriages, they drank champagne, they wore
top hats-'
The old man brightened suddenly.
'Top 'ats!' he said. 'Funny you should mention 'em. The same thing
come into my 'ead only yesterday, I dono why. I was jest thinking, I
ain't seen a top 'at in years. Gorn right out, they 'ave. The last time
I wore one was at my sister-in-law's funeral. And that was -- well, I
couldn't give you the date, but it must'a been fifty years ago. Of
course it was only 'ired for the occasion, you understand.'
'It isn't very important about the top hats,' said Winston
patiently. 'The point is, these capitalists -- they and a few lawyers
and priests and so forth who lived on them -- were the lords of the
earth. Everything existed for their benefit. You -- the ordinary
people, the workers -- were their slaves. They could do what they liked
with you. They could ship you off to Canada like cattle. They could
sleep with your daughters if they chose. They could order you to be
flogged with something called a cat-o'-nine tails. You had to take your
cap off when you passed them. Every capitalist went about with a gang
of lackeys who-'
The old man brightened again.
'Lackeys!' he said. 'Now there's a word I ain't 'eard since ever so
long. Lackeys! That reg'lar takes me back, that does. I recollect oh,
donkey's years ago -- I used to sometimes go to 'Yde Park of a Sunday
afternoon to 'ear the blokes making speeches. Salvation Army, Roman
Catholics, Jews, Indians -- all sorts there was. And there was one
bloke -- well, I couldn't give you 'is name, but a real powerful
speaker 'e was. 'E didn't 'alf give it 'em! "Lackeys!" 'e says,
"lackeys of the bourgeoisie! Flunkies of the ruling class!" Parasites
-- that was another of them. And 'yenas -- 'e definitely called 'em
'yenas. Of course 'e was referring to the Labour Party, you
understand.'
Winston had the feeling that they were talking at crosspurposes.
'What I really wanted to know was this,' he said. 'Do you feel that
you have more freedom now than you had in those days? Are you treated
more like a human being? In the old days, the rich people, the people
at the top-'
'The 'Ouse of Lords,' put in the old man reminiscently.
'The House of Lords, if you like. What I am asking is, were these
people able to treat you as an inferior, simply because they were rich
and you were poor? Is it a fact, for instance, that you had to call
them "Sir" and take off your cap when you passed them?'
The old man appeared to think deeply. He drank off about a quarter of his beer before answering.
'Yes,' he said. 'They liked you to touch your cap to 'em. It showed
respect, like. I didn't agree with it, myself, but I done it often
enough. Had to, as you might say.'
'And was it usual -- I'm only quoting what I've read in history
books -- was it usual for these people and their servants to push you
off the pavement into the gutter?'
'One of 'em pushed me once,' said the old man. 'I recollect it as
if it was yesterday. It was Boat Race night -- terribly rowdy they used
to get on Boat Race night -- and I bumps into a young bloke on
Shaftesbury Avenue. Quite a gent, 'e was -- dress shirt, top 'at, black
overcoat. 'E was kind of zig-zagging across the pavement, and I bumps
into 'im accidental-like. 'E says, "Why can't you look where you're
going?" 'e says. I say, "Ju think you've bought the bleeding pavement?"
'E says, "I'll twist your bloody 'ead off if you get fresh with me." I
says, "You're drunk. I'll give you in charge in 'alf a minute," I says.
An' if you'll believe me, 'e puts 'is 'and on my chest and gives me a
shove as pretty near sent me under the wheels of a bus. Well, I was
young in them days, and I was going to 'ave fetched 'im one, only-'
A sense of helplessness took hold of Winston. The old man's memory
was nothing but a rubbish-heap of details. One could question him all
day without getting any real information. The party histories might
still be true, after a fashion: they might even be completely true. He
made a last attempt.
'Perhaps I have not made myself clear,' he said. 'What I'm trying
to say is this. You have been alive a very long time; you lived half
your life before the Revolution. In 1925, for instance, you were
already grown up. Would you say from what you can remember, that life
in 1925 was better than it is now, or worse? If you could choose, would
you prefer to live then or now?'
The old man looked meditatively at the darts board. He finished up
his beer, more slowly than before. When he spoke it was with a tolerant
philosophical air, as though the beer had mellowed him.
'I know what you expect me to say,' he said. 'You expect me to say
as I'd sooner be young again. Most people'd say they'd sooner be young,
if you arst' 'em. You got your 'ealth and strength when you're young.
When you get to my time of life you ain't never well. I suffer
something wicked from my feet, and my bladder's jest terrible. Six and
seven times a night it 'as me out of bed. On the other 'and, there's
great advantages in being a old man. You ain't got the same worries. No
truck with women, and that's a great thing. I ain't 'ad a woman for
near on thirty year, if you'd credit it. Nor wanted to, what's more.'
Winston sat back against the window-sill. It was no use going on.
He was about to buy some more beer when the old man suddenly got up and
shuffled rapidly into the stinking urinal at the side of the room. The
extra half-litre was already working on him. Winston sat for a minute
or two gazing at his empty glass, and hardly noticed when his feet
carried him out into the street again. Within twenty years at the most,
he reflected, the huge and simple question, 'Was life better before the
Revolution than it is now?' would have ceased once and for all to be
answerable. But in effect it was unanswerable even now, since the few
scattered survivors from the ancient world were incapable of comparing
one age with another. They remembered a million useless things, a
quarrel with a workmate, a hunt for a lost bicycle pump, the expression
on a long-dead sister's face, the swirls of dust on a windy morning
seventy years ago: but all the relevant facts were outside the range of
their vision. They were like the ant, which can see small objects but
not large ones. And when memory failed and written records were
falsified -- when that happened, the claim of the Party to have
improved the conditions of human life had got to be accepted, because
there did not exist, and never again could exist, any standard against
which it could be tested.
At this moment his train of thought stopped abruptly. He halted and
looked up. He was in a narrow street, with a few dark little shops,
interspersed among dwelling-houses. Immediately above his head there
hung three discoloured metal balls which looked as if they had once
been gilded. He seemed to know the place. Of course! He was standing
outside the junk-shop where he had bought the diary.
A twinge of fear went through him. It had been a sufficiently rash
act to buy the book in the beginning, and he had sworn never to come
near the place again. And yet the instant that he allowed his thoughts
to wander, his feet had brought him back here of their own accord. It
was precisely against suicidal impulses of this kind that he had hoped
to guard himself by opening the diary. At the same time he noticed that
although it was nearly twenty-one hours the shop was still open. With
the feeling that he would be less conspicuous inside than hanging about
on the pavement, he stepped through the doorway. If questioned, he
could plausibly say that he was trying to buy razor blades.
The proprietor had just lighted a hanging oil lamp which gave off
an unclean but friendly smell. He was a man of perhaps sixty, frail and
bowed, with a long, benevolent nose, and mild eyes distorted by thick
spectacles. His hair was almost white, but his eyebrows were bushy and
still black. His spectacles, his gentle, fussy movements, and the fact
that he was wearing an aged jacket of black velvet, gave him a vague
air of intellectuality, as though he had been some kind of literary
man, or perhaps a musician. His voice was soft, as though faded, and
his accent less debased than that of the majority of proles.
'I recognized you on the pavement,' he said immediately. 'You're
the gentleman that bought the young lady's keepsake album. That was a
beautiful bit of paper, that was. Cream-laid, it used to be called.
There's been no paper like that made for -- oh, I dare say fifty
years.' He peered at Winston over the top of his spectacles. 'Is there
anything special I can do for you? Or did you just want to look round?'
'I was passing,' said Winston vaguely. 'I just looked in. I don't want anything in particular.'
'It's just as well,' said the other, 'because I don't suppose I
could have satisfied you.' He made an apologetic gesture with his
softpalmed hand. 'You see how it is; an empty shop, you might say.
Between you and me, the antique trade's just about finished. No demand
any longer, and no stock either. Furniture, china, glass it's all been
broken up by degrees. And of course the metal stuff's mostly been
melted down. I haven't seen a brass candlestick in years.'
The tiny interior of the shop was in fact uncomfortably full, but
there was almost nothing in it of the slightest value. The floorspace
was very restricted, because all round the walls were stacked
innumerable dusty picture-frames. In the window there were trays of
nuts and bolts, worn-out chisels, penknives with broken blades,
tarnished watches that did not even pretend to be in going order, and
other miscellaneous rubbish. Only on a small table in the corner was
there a litter of odds and ends -- lacquered snuffboxes, agate
brooches, and the like -- which looked as though they might include
something interesting. As Winston wandered towards the table his eye
was caught by a round, smooth thing that gleamed softly in the
lamplight, and he picked it up.
It was a heavy lump of glass, curved on one side, flat on the
other, making almost a hemisphere. There was a peculiar softness, as of
rainwater, in both the colour and the texture of the glass. At the
heart of it, magnified by the curved surface, there was a strange,
pink, convoluted object that recalled a rose or a sea anemone.
'What is it?' said Winston, fascinated.
'That's coral, that is,' said the old man. 'It must have come from
the Indian Ocean. They used to kind of embed it in the glass. That
wasn't made less than a hundred years ago. More, by the look of it.'
'It's a beautiful thing,' said Winston.
'It is a beautiful thing,' said the other appreciatively.
'But there's not many that'd say so nowadays.' He coughed. 'Now, if
it so happened that you wanted to buy it, that'd cost you four dollars.
I can remember when a thing like that would have fetched eight pounds,
and eight pounds was -- well, I can't work it out, but it was a lot of
money. But who cares about genuine antiques nowadays even the few
that's left?'
Winston immediately paid over the four dollars and slid the coveted
thing into his pocket. What appealed to him about it was not so much
its beauty as the air it seemed to possess of belonging to an age quite
different from the present one. The soft, rainwatery glass was not like
any glass that he had ever seen. The thing was doubly attractive
because of its apparent uselessness, though he could guess that it must
once have been intended as a paperweight. It was very heavy in his
pocket, but fortunately it did not make much of a bulge. It was a queer
thing, even a compromising thing, for a Party member to have in his
possession. Anything old, and for that matter anything beautiful, was
always vaguely suspect. The old man had grown noticeably more cheerful
after receiving the four dollars. Winston realized that he would have
accepted three or even two.
'There's another room upstairs that you might care to take a look
at,' he said. 'There's not much in it. Just a few pieces. We'll do with
a light if we're going upstairs.'
He lit another lamp, and, with bowed back, led the way slowly up
the steep and worn stairs and along a tiny passage, into a room which
did not give on the street but looked out on a cobbled yard and a
forest of chimney-pots. Winston noticed that the furniture was still
arranged as though the room were meant to be lived in. There was a
strip of carpet on the floor, a picture or two on the walls, and a
deep, slatternly arm-chair drawn up to the fireplace. An old-fashioned
glass clock with a twelve-hour face was ticking away on the
mantelpiece. Under the window, and occupying nearly a quarter of the
room, was an enormous bed with the mattress still on it.
'We lived here till my wife died,' said the old man half
apologetically. 'I'm selling the furniture off by little and little.
Now that's a beautiful mahogany bed, or at least it would be if you
could get the bugs out of it. But I dare say you'd find it a little bit
cumbersome.'
He was holdlng the lamp high up, so as to illuminate the whole
room, and in the warm dim light the place looked curiously inviting.
The thought flitted through Winston's mind that it would probably be
quite easy to rent the room for a few dollars a week, if he dared to
take the risk. It was a wild, impossible notion, to be abandoned as
soon as thought of; but the room had awakened in him a sort of
nostalgia, a sort of ancestral memory. It seemed to him that he knew
exactly what it felt like to sit in a room like this, in an arm-chair
beside an open fire with your feet in the fender and a kettle on the
hob; utterly alone, utterly secure, with nobody watching you, no voice
pursuing you, no sound except the singing of the kettle and the
friendly ticking of the clock.
'There's no telescreen!' he could not help murmuring.
'Ah,' said the old man, 'I never had one of those things. Too
expensive. And I never seemed to feel the need of it, somehow. Now
that's a nice gateleg table in the corner there. Though of course you'd
have to put new hinges on it if you wanted to use the flaps.'
There was a small bookcase in the other corner, and Winston had
already gravitated towards it. It contained nothing but rubbish. The
hunting-down and destruction of books had been done with the same
thoroughness in the prole quarters as everywhere else. It was very
unlikely that there existed anywhere in Oceania a copy of a book
printed earlier than 1960. The old man, still carrying the lamp, was
standing in front of a picture in a rosewood frame which hung on the
other side of the fireplace, opposite the bed.
'Now, if you happen to be interested in old prints at all-' he began delicately.
Winston came across to examine the picture. It was a steel
engraving of an oval building with rectangular windows, and a small
tower in front. There was a railing running round the building, and at
the rear end there was what appeared to be a statue. Winston gazed at
it for some moments. It seemed vaguely familiar, though he did not
remember the statue.
'The frame's fixed to the wall,' said the old man, 'but I could unscrew it for you, I dare say.'
'I know that building,' said Winston finally. 'It's a ruin now. It's in the middle of the street outside the Palace of Justice.'
'That's right. Outside the Law Courts. It was bombed in -- oh, many
years ago. It was a church at one time, St Clement Danes, its name
was.' He smiled apologetically, as though conscious of saying something
slightly ridiculous, and added: 'Oranges and lemons, say the bells of
St Clement's!'
'What's that?' said Winston.
'Oh- "Oranges and lemons, say the bells of St Clement's." That was
a rhyme we had when I was a little boy. How it goes on I don't
remember, but I do know it ended up, "Here comes a candle to light you
to bed, Here comes a chopper to chop off your head." It was a kind of a
dance. They held out their arms for you to pass under, and when they
came to "Here comes a chopper to chop off your head" they brought their
arms down and caught you. It was just names of churches. All the London
churches were in it -- all the principal ones, that is.'
Winston wondered vaguely to what century the church belonged. It
was always difficult to determine the age of a London building.
Anything large and impressive, if it was reasonably new in appearance,
was automatically claimed as having been built since the Revolution,
while anything that was obviously of earlier date was ascribed to some
dim period called the Middle Ages. The centuries of capitalism were
held to have produced nothing of any value. One could not learn history
from architecture any more than one could learn it from books. Statues,
inscriptions, memorial stones, the names of streets -- anything that
might throw light upon the past had been systematically altered.
'I never knew it had been a church,' he said.
'There's a lot of them left, really,' said the old man, 'though
they've been put to other uses. Now, how did that rhyme go? Ah! I've
got it!
"Oranges and lemons, say the bells of St Clement's,
You owe me three farthings, say the bells of St Martin's -- "
there, now, that's as far as I can get. A farthing, that was a small copper coin, looked something like a cent.'
'Where was St Martin's?' said Winston.
'St Martin's? That's still standing. It's in Victory Square,
alongside the picture gallery. A building with a kind of a triangular
porch and pillars in front, and a big flight of steps.'
Winston knew the place well. It was a museum used for propaganda
displays of various kinds -- scale models of rocket bombs and Floating
Fortresses, wax-work tableaux illustrating enemy atrocities, and the
like.
'St Martin's-in-the-Fields it used to be called,' supplemented the
old man, 'though I don't recollect any fields anywhere in those parts.'
Winston did not buy the picture. It would have been an even more
incongruous possession than the glass paperweight, and impossible to
carry home, unless it were taken out of its frame. But he lingered for
some minutes more, talking to the old man, whose name, he discovered,
was not Weeks -- as one might have gathered from the inscription over
the shop-front -- but Charrington. Mr Charrington, it seemed, was a
widower aged sixty-three and had inhabited this shop for thirty years.
Throughout that time he had been intending to alter the name over the
window, but had never quite got to the point of doing it. All the while
that they were talking the half-remembered rhyme kept running through
Winston's head. Oranges and lemons say the bells of St Clement's, You
owe me three farthings, say the bells of St Martin's! It was curious,
but when you said it to yourself you had the illusion of actually
hearing bells, the bells of a lost London that still existed somewhere
or other, disguised and forgotten. From one ghostly steeple after
another he seemed to hear them pealing forth. Yet so far as he could
remember he had never in real life heard church bells ringing.
He got away from Mr Charrington and went down the stairs alone, so
as not to let the old man see him reconnoitring the street before
stepping out of the door. He had already made up his mind that after a
suitable interval -- a month, say -- he would take the risk of visiting
the shop again. It was perhaps not more dangerous than shirking an
evening at the Centre. The serious piece of folly had been to come back
here in the first place, after buying the diary and without knowing
whether the proprietor of the shop could be trusted. However-!
Yes, he thought again, he would come back. He would buy further
scraps of beautiful rubbish. He would buy the engraving of St Clement
Danes, take it out of its frame, and carry it home concealed under the
jacket of his overalls. He would drag the rest of that poem out of Mr
Charrington's memory. Even the lunatic project of renting the room
upstairs flashed momentarily through his mind again. For perhaps five
seconds exaltation made him careless, and he stepped out on to the
pavement without so much as a preliminary glance through the window. He
had even started humming to an improvised tune --
Oranges and lemons, say the bells of St Clement's,
You owe me three farthings, say the --
Suddenly his heart seemed to turn to ice and his bowels to water. A
figure in blue overalls was coming down the pavement, not ten metres
away. It was the girl from the Fiction Department, the girl with dark
hair. The light was failing, but there was no difficulty in recognizing
her. She looked him straight in the face, then walked quickly on as
though she had not seen him.
For a few seconds Winston was too paralysed to move. Then he turned
to the right and walked heavily away, not noticing for the moment that
he was going in the wrong direction. At any rate, one question was
settled. There was no doubting any longer that the girl was spying on
him. She must have followed him here, because it was not credible that
by pure chance she should have happened to be walking on the same
evening up the same obscure backstreet, kilometres distant from any
quarter where Party members lived. It was too great a coincidence.
Whether she was really an agent of the Thought Police, or simply an
amateur spy actuated by officiousness, hardly mattered. It was enough
that she was watching him. Probably she had seen him go into the pub as
well.
It was an effort to walk. The lump of glass in his pocket banged
against his thigh at each step, and he was half minded to take it out
and throw it away. The worst thing was the pain in his belly. For a
couple of minutes he had the feeling that he would die if he did not
reach a lavatory soon. But there would be no public lavatories in a
quarter like this. Then the spasm passed, leaving a dull ache behind.
The street was a blind alley. Winston halted, stood for several
seconds wondering vaguely what to do, then turned round and began to
retrace his steps. As he turned it occurred to him that the girl had
only passed him three minutes ago and that by running he could probably
catch up with her. He could keep on her track till they were in some
quiet place, and then smash her skull in with a cobblestone. The piece
of glass in his pocket would be heavy enough for the job. But he
abandoned the idea immediately, because even the thought of making any
physical effort was unbearable. He could not run, he could not strike a
blow. Besides, she was young and lusty and would defend herself. He
thought also of hurrying to the Community Centre and staying there till
the place closed, so as to establish a partial alibi for the evening.
But that too was impossible. A deadly lassitude had taken hold of him.
All he wanted was to get home quickly and then sit down and be quiet.
It was after twenty-two hours when he got back to the flat. The
lights would be switched off at the main at twenty-three thirty. He
went into the kitchen and swallowed nearly a teacupful of Victory Gin.
Then he went to the table in the alcove, sat down, and took the diary
out of the drawer. But he did not open it at once. From the telescreen
a brassy female voice was squalling a patriotic song. He sat staring at
the marbled cover of the book, trying without success to shut the voice
out of his consciousness.
It was at night that they came for you, always at night. The proper
thing was to kill yourself before they got you. Undoubtedly some people
did so. Many of the disappearances were actually suicides. But it
needed desperate courage to kill yourself in a world where firearms, or
any quick and certain poison, were completely unprocurable. He thought
with a kind of astonishment of the biological uselessness of pain and
fear, the treachery of the human body which always freezes into inertia
at exactly the moment when a special effort is needed. He might have
silenced the dark-haired girl if only he had acted quickly enough: but
precisely because of the extremity of his danger he had lost the power
to act. It struck him that in moments of crisis one is never fighting
against an external enemy, but always against one's own body. Even now,
in spite of the gin, the dull ache in his belly made consecutive
thought impossible. And it is the same, he perceived, in all seemingly
heroic or tragic situations. On the battlefield, in the torture
chamber, on a sinking ship, the issues that you are fighting for are
always forgotten, because the body swells up until it fills the
universe, and even when you are not paralysed by fright or screaming
with pain, life is a moment-to-moment struggle against hunger or cold
or sleeplessness, against a sour stomach or an aching tooth.
He opened the diary. It was important to write something down. The
woman on the telescreen had started a new song. Her voice seemed to
stick into his brain like jagged splinters of glass. He tried to think
of O'Brien, for whom, or to whom, the diary was written, but instead he
began thinking of the things that would happen to him after the Thought
Police took him away. It would not matter if they killed you at once.
To be killed was what you expected. But before death (nobody spoke of
such things, yet everybody knew of them) there was the routine of
confession that had to be gone through: the grovelling on the floor and
screaming for mercy, the crack of broken bones, the smashed teeth, and
bloody clots of hair.
Why did you have to endure it, since the end was always the same?
Why was it not possible to cut a few days or weeks out of your life?
Nobody ever escaped detection, and nobody ever failed to confess. When
once you had succumbed to thoughtcrime it was certain that by a given
date you would be dead. Why then did that horror, which altered
nothing, have to lie embedded in future time?
He tried with a little more success than before to summon up the
image of O'Brien. 'We shall meet in the place where there is no
darkness,' O'Brien had said to him. He knew what it meant, or thought
he knew. The place where there is no darkness was the imagined future,
which one would never see, but which, by foreknowledge, one could
mystically share in. But with the voice from the telescreen nagging at
his ears he could not follow the train of thought further. He put a
cigarette in his mouth. Half the tobacco promptly fell out on to his
tongue, a bitter dust which was difficult to spit out again. The face
of Big Brother swam into his mind, displacing that of O'Brien. Just as
he had done a few days earlier, he slid a coin out of his pocket and
looked at it. The face gazed up at him, heavy, calm, protecting: but
what kind of smile was hidden beneath the dark moustache? Like a leaden
knell the words came back at him:
WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH